4 Workplace Wellness Lessons from David Beckham
Photo credit: Canva.com
By Kristin Bower
I don’t like sports. I am not athletically gifted, shall we say. I was driving the other day and saw some kids running around the neighbourhood as part of gym class. When I saw the last kid strolling along, I thought, I get you, girl. I get you.
I sometimes try to use sports metaphors when I am working with clients or leading a workshop and they always get mixed up resulting in some laughs (maybe that’s why I keep trying them!).
Imagine my surprise when, as I watched the four-part Netflix documentary series on David Beckham’s football career, I found myself enthralled. I laughed, I cried, and was left with a nice dose of inspiration.
A few days later and I can’t stop thinking about some lessons that we can take away from Becks when it comes to workplace wellness and mental health.
Lesson #1: We all make mistakes. Don’t give up.
Even when you are living your dream, some days are just hard. While playing in the final match of the 1998 World Cup against Argentina, Beckham received a red card. A single action in the heat of the moment had lasting repercussions. Argentina won, and the England fans turned on Beckham. Boy, did they turn. In what lasted for months, he experienced verbal abuse in public and in newspapers. He went from golden boy to most hated man in England in a moment.
But he didn’t give up.
Somehow, Beckham persevered. I don’t know how he did it. And, as shown in the documentary, it certainly had an impact on his mental health. But he showed up, he worked hard, and went on with England to win the World Cup four years later.
So, while your mistake at work might not mean the loss of a huge, highly valued prize, it can still sting. And when we screw up – big or small – the instinct might be to give up.
Don’t.
Reflect on the mistake, find the lesson, and grow from it. If you are a people leader, make sure that your employees know that mistakes are OK. We all make mistakes. We all fail. But that’s also how we learn grow, and become better, too. Innovation and creativity can come from failure.
Lesson #2: Community is essential.
In 2022, years after this low point in his career, Beckham said this on former England and Manchester United teammate and friend Gary Neville’s podcast:
“It’s probably harsh to say I still feel let down by that. I look back at that moment, and we were young. Yes, I made a mistake, but there are certain people in teams and in football that you expect to get behind you and expect to support you no matter what.”
In 1998 we didn’t speak about mental health to the extent that we do today. And definitely not among men. So, while I get that his teammates maybe didn’t have the tools to talk to him about this, sometimes you have to put aside any feelings of awkwardness and just simply reach out. Over two decades later and Beckham is still feeling the impact of a lack of support from his teammates.
Manchester United Manager Sir Alex Ferguson – the “boss” – was one of the few who showed support, says Beckham:
“The morning after, [Ferguson] phoned me early morning and he said, 'You OK son?' I said yes, and I think I got emotional to him as well. And he just said, 'Don't worry, go away for a few weeks ... come back to the club, and you've got us.' That was all I needed to hear."
The importance of community and human connections can’t be overstated. Brene Brown says this about connection in her book Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead:
“Connection is why we're here. We are hardwired to connect with others, it's what gives purpose and meaning to our lives, and without it there is suffering.”
Lesson #3: Empathy can make all the difference.
In 2003 Beckham was sent to Real Madrid. He went ahead to Madrid and his wife, Victoria (aka Posh Spice) stayed back in England with their two young kids and then joined him a few months later.
As he says in the documentary, this was the first time he didn’t have his family with him. He was struggling. But this time, his new teammate Michel Selgado saw it and did something about it. Selgado describes in the doc how he and the Real Madrid team formed a circle of support around Beckham.
If you see someone struggling in the workplace or in life, reach out. You don’t have to have any answers or know the “right” words to say. Often, just being there is enough. In fact, the Real Madrid team had players who spoke different languages so there wasn’t one common language that united them all. One of my favorite moments in the doc is when Beckham describes his relationship with one of the other players who doesn’t speak English. He said they could laugh for hours together because, somehow, they just knew what the other meant. So there goes the old excuse, “I don’t know what to say.”
What did unite them? A purpose, a common goal to work towards, and a sense of community.
Lesson #4: Understanding different sides can bring us closer.
In 2007 Beckham moved to the LA Galaxy. He made LOTS of money, but he was also playing in a league that was, let’s say, not exactly in the same league he was used to playing in! He got frustrated. He wanted to go back to Europe. But he couldn’t leave.
His behaviour had a negative impact on his teammates. There was resentment and there was anger. One teammate in particular was not having it: Landon Donovan. Words were said publicly, and frustrations aired. All of which made an already bad situation worse.
The coach brought the two players together and said to David (and I am paraphrasing): The Galaxy is Landon’s Man U. How you felt about that team is how he feels about this one. There were apologies and deeper understanding of the two sides. Once the air was cleared, they could move forward.
This is such an important lesson whether we are talking about workplace issues among colleagues or the huge divide that we see in society on so many issues. Is your goal to change someone’s mind, prove them wrong, or dig you heels in?
I think a far better goal is to better understand and to see the humanity in each other.
When we understand different perspectives, experiences, and the impact of our behaviour on others, we can start to work together better and more collaboratively.
“You will go through tough times; it’s about getting through them.”
- David Beckham
Life is not a simple, easy journey. For anyone. David Beckham’s career in football is a reminder of that. But I don’t think anything easily achieved is particularly valuable or interesting. But what I do know is that when we have support from a community of people who have our backs, it’s a little bit easier. To know that you are not alone is a powerful thing.
Now, is there a footie match somewhere that I can watch? Maybe I’ll just watch a few Spice Girl videos on YouTube…
Kristin Bower is a partner in Leda HR and a diversity, equity, and inclusion consultant living and working in Metro Vancouver on the traditional and unceded lands of the Katzie (q̓ic̓əy̓) People. Endlessly curious, she is dedicated to making the world a better place, one small act or conversation at a time!